Author: juliems25

March HQ Newsletter: Life Quest

juliems25

What is a belief? According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary a belief is defined as: something that is accepted, considered to be true, or held as an opinion.

Why are beliefs important? Because beliefs give us security in a world that feels dangerous. Some beliefs become so ingrained that we no longer have to remember to believe them, we just do. Then we continually look for evidence to prove that those beliefs are true. For example, if you believe that the world is full of liars, then all you see is everyone lying. What you believe creates your experiences and your experiences confirms your beliefs.

Here’s an example, if you believe you are fat, then you are placing value on the experience of being fat. Therefore, it would not align with your belief system to be skinny. You will obsessively notice how fat you are no matter what your weight actually is. Our experience is evidence of what we believe, honor, or hold dear. If you want to know what someone believes, simply notice, what are they experiencing?

The good news is that you can upgrade or change your beliefs. When you do that, the result will be a new experience. This also includes your experience of stress. How do beliefs relate to stress? Mental and emotional stress is caused by our beliefs. Why? When something happens in our lives, we have very specific thoughts to help us process and analyze that situation. Those thoughts were created by our beliefs. For example someone gains 10 pounds. The situation itself is neutral. Someone’s beliefs about gaining 10 pounds are going to result in thoughts. Thoughts are not neutral. The thoughts are going to assign meaning to the situation. Here are some possible beliefs that may arise.

BELIEF / “THOUGHT”

1.) Gaining 10 lbs. does not matter. “It’s no big deal.”

2.) It’s not OK to gain 10 lbs. It’s not OK to be fat. “I must lose this weight immediately.”

3.) Curves are sexy. “I like this bigger backside. I look good.”

4.) I am the most important thing in my life. “I want to understand my behavior – this was a challenging day no wonder I ate the entire carton of ice cream.”

*This article is featured in the March HQ Newsletter.  For more articles on Life, Health, Wellness, and Plant-based recipes subscribe to the Heart’s Quest Monthly Newsletter – it’s 100% FREE! 

February HQ Newsletter: Wellness Quest

juliems25

For the past few years our world has not been the easiest place to live in. There has been an ever growing focus on mental health. The term “self-care” is common place in our mainstream society. Many of us practice self-care as a way to remedy stress. It can help us to feel better and happier. How does it feel to take time to care for yourself? How often do you practice self-care? I’m certain that you take some time out for yourself (because you are reading this article). What if you could feel that way more consistently in your daily life? I invite you to be open to a new idea. Instead of focusing on practicing self-care, start prioritizing self-love. How often do you practice self-love? Let’s break down the difference between self-care and self-love.

Self-care: the practice of taking an active role in protecting one’s own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress. *Google definition

The word “care” in self-care, implies that something is broken, sick, or not right and that we need to “practice” protecting our well-being and happiness in order to make it better. Often, the term “self-care” compliments being or feeling too stressed, too busy, too tired, TOO MUCH of everyday life. A common remedy may be spending an afternoon at a spa or taking a day off from work. These remedies have benefits. However, these are remedies that cannot be fulfilled every day. Another thing to consider is that these remedies do not address managing and/or preventing the “too much’s” before they occur.

Instead of focusing on practicing self-care, I invite you to prioritize self-love.

Self-love: regard for one’s own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristic). *Google definition

I like the use of the word “regard” in this definition of self-love because it implies that something was thought out and/or considered. When you understand, accept, and implement what you TRULY need from a place of love your well-being and happiness will follow. Self-love becomes a way of being that you don’t have to schedule an appointment for. This is truly the most important thing to give priority to in your life. If this is not aligned in your life nothing else will be. You will continually be trying to fill your constantly depleting cup.

Here are some questions to help you tap into your self-love.

-How often do you acknowledge what YOU need? Put everything else aside – family, job, household tasks, etc.

-When was the last time you did something for yourself (without any guilt attached) that left you feeling truly happy, engaged, and energized?

-How can you be compassionate towards yourself and your needs?

-What do you need right now in order to get one thing you truly need into your daily life?

Self-care is important but, self-love is vital.

When it comes to self-love, understanding, accepting, and implementing what you truly want and need is not always easy. If you would like help and support diving deeper into this subject contact me. I offer one free coaching session per person. Go to: heartsquestcoaching.com/book-a-session

*This article is featured in the February Heart’s Quest Newsletter. For more articles on Health, Life, Wellness, and delicious Plant-based recipes start your FREE subscription today. Go to: https://heartsquestcoaching.com/hq-newsletter/ to get started.